Marriage : a licence to change

Radhika was a happy soul. And she married Pranav for being the anchor to her hovering mind. He bought sense to her decisions. She bought fun to his life. She was callous. He was Mr. Perfect.But after a marriage and 2 kids between them, they were losing each other. All the conversations had become too mechanical. He did his duties, she did hers. 

But it always irked her. She didn’t want this. 

She made up her mind. This had to end. The cribbing, cursing, fault findings. They were perfect strangers living together. Trying to balance between what they were and what they should be . Marriage, society, parental expectations had taking a toll on there relationship. She finally she sat down with a pen and a paper. No email, no WhatsApp. Just ink and thoughts. “Dear pranav,  After 10 years of marriage. Our problem is I am not you and you’re not me. And isn’t that exactly why we got married. You used to get hassled easily. Small things like checking if the lock is bolted 20th time. Why did someone have curd with milk . Why’s the WiFi of a phone on, if you’re not using it.

They disrupted your peace of mind. You still can’t sleep over them.  This is you. For me these things never mattered. Anything playing havoc with my mind, I run away from it. I have been an escapist. If something troubles me I sleep over it. Literally.  If a piece of news bothers me. I change the channel. I have been like this. I am this. And this is what you asked for. 

I can’t handle anxiety. I can’t console or stay in a depressing environment. You have always known that. So why do you want me to put up with it now and lose my sanity .  Why after 10 years you want me changed. These things make me. Bit by bit. I hate ironing the clothes. Always have. I don’t do that to annoy you. This is me. I eat slow. You found it cute, didn’t you. Then why is it that now you have to make a public issue out of it that I’ll take a year to finish my food. 

And maybe you have a similar list for me too. Things I adored then , but abhor now. Why are we doing this to each other. Why do we want a clone. 

If god had to make us same, we would have been siblings and not life partner’s.

We have to take a call. At 35. I can’t change. And so can’t you. And we still have a lot of time in our lives. At Least I feel so. Oh! The optimist me. These fights will get worst. The expectations will become a mammoth.

So let’s decide now. Do we want it to work. 

Let’s not sugar coat things. Just a yes or no. The back side of this sheet of paper is blank. Let me know what you want from me and our lives. And please no conditions applied. I won’t question your decision. 

Because for once I am not escaping. I am trying my best to face it. Radhika”

What would you do? My friends who are reading this. Food for thought. Let’s ponder 🙂

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